Some Kind of Insanity...

Its odd how your body and mind chooses what to emphasize and remember, and what it chooses to downplay and forget.  After my last race I am just convinced that something has to be afoot.  I know that somewhere deep down I remember how hard it was, how much I pushed myself and how after a remarkably short period of time after I finished the difficulty of it all just kind of faded.  It reminds me of a 16,000ft mountain climb I did with my family.  My dad told me that, looking back, it never seems as hard  and that he sort of struggled to remember how difficult it really was after the fact.  Weird...

The difficulty.  Physically I guess it was a variety of things that contributed to it: I didn't train on trails, I'd never run that far, I didn't do any hill work, etc.  Really though, the game is all mental.  I'd heard this before but its hard to believe when you've never pushed yourself.  Don't get me wrong, my half marathons have been challenging but its quite different than forcing yourself to do something your body just doesn't want to do.  I remember my muscles being very fatigued (at climbing all the god forsaken rocky hills that I never trained for) and all I wanted to do was just walk...it took at least 2 or 3 verbal commands to make myself break into a jog.  Then once I started jogging I was terrified to stop because I was afraid I wouldn't be able to bring myself to start again.  Nevertheless, the human body is an amazing creation and for some reason, well beyond my understanding, it did what I told it to.

Keep in mind, I did the wussy race.  This Bandera trail run was the Ultra Cup National Championship Race for the 100k.  I was lucky enough to have the opportunity to volunteer for the overnight shift to help in all the 100k-ers.  That was such a humbling experience.  How amazing that these people are running 62 miles! I got passed by about 4 or 5 of the elite ultrarunners on my 25k and they were just incredible, I can't even begin to describe...they were happy, friendly and graceful in their running.

The whole experience was invigorating.  Well - ok, so it was exhausting, but it was remarkably easy to forget the struggles and just remember the overall experience of running through the hills and beautiful trails.  I remember telling Mark on the drive back to San Antonio that I wanted to do an ultra someday.  This was after the whole exhaustion/fatigue/hunger/dehydration extravaganza that was my race.  After that experience I truly do believe that your body is just programmed to do things that are extreme, otherwise I don't think we'd so easily forget how hard it was.

So, here I am...contemplating when I should sign up for my first ultra and where I should fit in my trail runs after I finish my marathon.  I guess, if I were biologically programmed to remember the difficulty of accomplishing these things then I would; since I'm not, I'm going to take full advantage and do some pretty crazy stuff because at the end of the day if I don't remember how hard it was then all I'm left with is happiness :)











PS - Mark, seriously? 2:49 time??  You're a freakin rockstar and I'm so grateful that I have you around to keep me motivated :)  I will absolutely be there to cheer for you and Doug in a few weeks!!!!