Alright so I'm a little ticked. No, its not because facebook changed stuff again, I really really love the new timeline thing they have going on. Its very streamlined and lets me glance back into the past and remember good things. Except one. My past relationships. My ex boyfriends are not a part of this timeline and this pisses me off. And, because I'm ticked off, I will most certainly not blame myself for this rather upsetting link missing from my past...I will blame one of my exes.
Once upon a time I was driving to the airport with said ex in the front seat bitching about how I had pictures of my (previous) ex still on my facebook. He was right, by the way, there were tons of pictures (we'd dated for nearly 4 years!!!). I was told that this was a sign of my not having moved on, that it wasn't healthy, etc. Of course, all I could think was that I didn't really want to get rid of the pictures...because...well...he was such a huge part of my life. I didn't want to just go hit a delete button somewhere and erase him from my history. I verbally expressed this *exact* sentiment and the response was to the effect of "I understand, but you'll always have the memories." W.T.F. To me, there was something about facebook that chronicled my life from a certain point and I kind of liked that. I could go back and look at albums I uploaded, view comments, etc and it was nice to remember good times. I should have listened to myself (ok, ok, I'll take some blame for being a dumb ass girl who can't say no to a boy!! grrr...bitterness).
Lo and behold things didn't work out with the most recent ex and what happened? Thats right, I "deleted" his friggin pictures off my facebook too! Which, considering how this is really all his fault (remember, no blame for me right now, I'm not rational) I shouldn't feel all that bad about erasing his ass. But, I do. Because no matter how upset I am at the moment I still feel like I just deleted a part of my history off of my little timeline of life!!!! So many amazingly fun times were lost in my digital media history due to this stupid request.
I know a lot of people probably think this is all very silly but to me its not. I grew up in this whole digital boom era and yeah, I have my memories, and yeah, I have pictures stored on an external hard drive (and cds, etc) and yeah, I'm even friends with one of them. But let me ask you - what is so damn bad about enjoying and appreciating the fact that a website can chronicle your social life events?? And the better question, why did I let myself get talked into deleting these huge and important parts of my life all for the sake of "showing the world I moved on?"
Lesson learned: don't cave in to insecure boys. Ugh.
ok i know this could be considered mom advice but....Your past (whether a relationship or not) is Your past and shouldnt have to be erased for someone elses insecurities. What ever you have gone thru is because of your past. Others have to deal with it.
ReplyDeleteI do understand you did what you needed to do to try and keep the relationship happy..giving shouldnt be one sided.
Well, to his credit, he was right but the pictures really had nothing to do with it. I'd have them all still up right now (from both relationships) and I can honestly say I've more than moved on, haha.
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